Why do declare that I am an autistic psychotherapist and an ADHD-er?
Should therapists disclose anything about themselves to clients and if so, how much? This is debated frequently amongst therapists. Everyone has a view formed by what they were taught from the models of therapy that they studied, and from other sources. Apart from therapists working with client populations that prompt privacy for therapist safety, or from a counsellor’s personal preference for privacy for other reasons, one of the most important things that get considered when therapists reveal things about themselves is “How does this disclosure affect my clients?”
So, after asking myself that and consciously choosing to reveal that I am autistic and have ADHD I'd like to say a bit about my thinking behind that decision.
In the beginning, when I first meet a client, I want to find a way to see that person and to connect with them in a way that works for what they want or need. As well as it being a matter of respect to let clients know my neurotype, I think that by offering up this fact in advance, I’m inviting clients to see me, too. And, having the intention to really see each other is the start of our relationship and it may be the foundation upon how it continues.
As you can see from my blurb, I have described my therapy and coaching to be for neurodivergent people. I have done that because that is how my work is flowing. That’s a vague description, and my ability to explain this will evolve over time, but for now, I’ll say that working with neurodivergent clients is the best work that I have ever done. Subsequently, I started to do it more, and now I do it a lot. The work is definitely not about fixing autism, (something not broken in the first place) but it is about embracing being neurodivergent and recognising the significance of a person being neurodivergent. Because it is really, really, significant. It is crucial for the practitioner to know how neurotype is relevant to the issues a client brings to therapy, or to the ways neurotype is enmeshed with the challenges of reaching goals that coaching clients pursue. Clients know this and they want their therapists and coaches to know this.
In a general sense, showing my confidence and acceptance of my autistic identity, and owning my ADHD-ness, is intended to cast a shadow on any stigma and shame that people may feel about being neurodivergent. I’m not untouchable, though. I’m not saying that autism is my superpower and I’m very marvellous. I like my neurotype and my autistic ways can be quite cool at times, even amazing, but also I have challenges and struggles, as people do, and more specifically as neurodivergent people do. I hope that I am showing you that I’m being real, not hiding or disowning myself, but rather that I am presenting myself in an authentic way with the expectation that I deserve to be acknowledged, taken seriously, and accepted as a regular human being of worth.
When I think about the actual time in the sessions that clients and I have, I am aware that there are many benefits of having a counsellor who is neurodivergent. There can be honest discussions about so many things. For example, communication challenges, and sensory stuff, the impact of the neurotypical world, ways that you may have adapted or compromised yourself to exist or ‘get along’ and may still be doing that to your cost, attention and memory differences, overwhelm and reactions such as shutdown, meltdown, inertia, and more. Very importantly, there is an innate understanding of our vulnerability and the need for therapy to include clients recognising and implementing self-advocacy and realistic, effective, self-protection.
Moreover, with a neurodivergent psychotherapist, counsellor, or coach there may be much that you do not have to explain. Some clients have had past experiences of being misread repeatedly and in order to make any use of the sessions have had to explain at length to a neurotypical therapist the ways that their brain and body work. As a client they have felt drained from the effort it takes to describe and illustrate this to their therapist or coach. There’s often a heavyweight of feelings and sensations to deal with afterwards about having used up their session time to educate when they had wanted to invest in the sessions so that they personally can grow or heal.
Finally, I’ll say that the reason that I am saying that my counselling, psychotherapy, and coaching is for neurotypical people is because this is genuinely a specialisation of mine. I have studied formally and informally autism, ADHD, PDA, RSD, and diversity and inclusivity topics. And I continue to do so, both formally (courses) and informally (discussions, lived experience blogs, research papers). At this time (end of 2021) training for therapists about working with neurodivergent people is sparse and shallow (this will change over the coming decade). Being an ND therapist and having lived experience counts for a lot, especially when you do reflect and examine yourself, others and the world, then make sense of it and apply your findings to help clients. I accept that I am a work in progress. There is always more to learn, and in this area of expertise, there is a lot to learn. New information and research is coming out all of the time. Neurodivergent voices are being heard more and more. And there is an increase in relevant materials being written and published. I’m learning and developing my views, strategies and approaches every single day.